Questions I will have to face...

I'm aware that Emsley is only almost 10 months old and can't talk but it recently occurred to me that eventually I will have to face the tough questions with her. And no, I'm not talking about the birds and the bees type questions, I mean the adoption questions.

"Why wasn't I inside mommy's tummy?"

"How come my birthmom gave me away?"

"Did she love me?"

"Why couldn't you have real children?"

"Am I your real child?"

"Do you love me as much as you would a biological child?"

Wow, these are some really deep questions and I have such a desire to answer them as honestly as possible. Adoption isn't something Mike and I just jumped into. We spent a lot of time praying and talking about what this life changing decision would mean for us. Do I have all the answers to these tough questions...no. But I'm pretty comfortable with that.

All Emsley needs to know is that she is loved by so many people and that Miss Amy knew she couldn't give Emsley the family she deserved and loved her so much that she found us to take care of her. My daughter will always understand that she was adopted but I know these questions will arise.

On one hand I'm excited to share the answers with her. To remind her of how much she is loved and about how God planned her life is such a beautiful, unique way. Each time we have to answer one of these questions, I truly believe that we will bond in such a special way. The idea of Emsley asking these questions also scares me and makes me so sad. I hate that I will have to face these and I hate that she may ask them because she is hurting or confused. I just have to continue to pray that God gives us the wisdom and strength to face this. He already knows what the answers are to these questions and if or when they will come up in our life. I pray that Emsley feels comfortable to ask and know that we will be honest with her.

These are the tough parts of adoption but it's also why God called us to it. He knows we can do this and that through these conversations we will give Him all the glory!!!